More pics...

Pic 1: First unofficial shipment of supplies, food, clothing and gifts.

Pic 2: Even though these kurds have to deal with oppression from the countries around them. Iran kicked them out, Iraq wants them to "go away" and Jordan will not take them in. They opened their homes and set us up with a wonderful meal.

Pic 3: These folks call a strip of land, about eight hundred meters long and 500 meters wide, home. They are not recognized by the UN. They survive on assistance provided to them by coalition forces.

Pic 4: Pete, making friends.

Pic 5: Sandstorm.

Pics...

Pic 1: The "9-11" is made up of upside down M-16's with Kevlar on top.
Pic 2: Sandstorm just before it hit one of our check points.
Pic 3: ...
I've been diggin' through my pics and I keep coming across so many images that even though I've studied them before, they still get to me.
Many of the pics that I have, I took myself, but the ones that I posted here, were taken by buddies of mine, either during this deployment or when they were mobilized before. (the third pic was taken by one of our mechanics that was attached with the Army in '03)

I'll be posting some more real soon.

Take care and keep supporting the troops.

Days and daze...

I have now been home for almost a week. All that I can say is that I need to slow down a bit. No, I have not been bouncing around from one Welcome Home party to another. I just feel like I need to take care of my 'To Do' list in as little time as possible. I am not trying to mak up for the eight months that I lost. I realize that is not possible. But I keep wanting to do as much as I can each day. It's not my fault, I've just been so spun up for eight months that I am having a real hard time with relaxing. The first couple of nights were up and down for me. It was too quiet. I keep making comments like, "Hey, when did they put that up?" a building, school, what have you. And then I realize that I have been gone for almost a year. I have to remember that I need to be a spectator for a while and just absorb stuff.

Izabella is just amazing but so are the boys. They are both doing an fantastic job at being big brothers. I am one lucky "ese".

Transition..

1,209 miles, 23 with 2 hours and 40 minutes of sleep, six Monsters and a three Power bars later, I made it home!!! I pulled into El Paso just in time to drive by my kids school just as they were getting out for the day. I stopped down the street and waited for them to walk past me. They did not look in my direction which was perfect. I sat there and just watched them for a few seconds. Man, they have grown! I pulled from the curb and past them again. I stopped and pulled out my camera. I began filming them and as they came alongside my rental, Marcelo looked across the street directly at me. I put the camera down and smiled at him. He just froze. Sergio looked back at his little brother and then over at what he was staring at. He realized that Marcelo was looking at Dad. And he did the same thing. They looked at the ground, then eachother and back at me. They started making their way over to me, I stepped out of the vehicle and drew them in as close as humanly possible. But we did not cry. WE did not but I did. They climbed into the vehicle and we made our way home. The whole way home they kept looking at me and at eachother with very little emotion on their faces. They were in shock. I kept looking back at them and at how much they have changed. We made it home and the dogs went nuts. Their barks even sounded confused. Instead of BARK! BARK! it was more like "BAH-BUHRK, WTF?!?!" I made it into the house, yes, Monica knew that I was coming. She was waiting for me with the baby in her arms. I took the baby in my arms and saying that the dam broke is an understatement. FEMA was kicking in the door to see if we needed assistance with the flooding. OK, so they showed up two weeks later but you get the picture. We held eachother for what seemed like 8 months. That's when the boys let loose and cried. We sat down and just let the emotions out.

It was cool.

Waiting game...

March 20, 2007
I am now going through the demobilization process. So much of it is such a waste of time. We are ordered to muster at a certain time but we never start the scheduled evolution on time. Most of the time has been spent listening to briefs on material that we are all ready familiar with. Before making it back to Gulfport, the military had been putting such an emphasis on helping us to transition back to 'normal'. The truth is so much of what we have done so far is absolutely unnecessary. Much of the information that we have received is overkill. We have been through much of this training before. It almost seems like they dug up ways to fill up our days but yet we get two to three hours for lunch. “We want to help you get processed out ASAP so that you can get back home.” And yet, if you need any follow up or additional information no one can be found as the regular navy cuts out by 3 p.m. So we have to wait until the next day. Thanks! But there's more. This morning we went down for our morning muster at 0715. We turned in the last of our gear. We were finished by 0730. I was back in my room and I did not have to be back until 1300. That is more than five hours of nothing. It does not make any sense for me. “We want you out of here ASAP but we are going to give you lots of time off.” Don't they understand that all that we do, all of us, is sit around and have WTF?! conversations about this process?
For me, all that I can is watch the second hand on the clock and wonder, “How much longer before I get to go home? Hold the baby for the first time? My boys? Monica? My family?
I am in a hurry to go home but before I do that I feel that I do need to uncork some of the “stuff” that I have kept inside. I have requested permission to not fly home but instead take a road trip across this part of the country. I've always enjoyed road trips but this time it will be “new”. While I was away I kept picturing scenes from small town America. The out of the way towns, hidden along the back roads that, to me, have always defined America.

Pic: This flag was a gift from my Mom and Dad. Normally, it hangs in our sun room. This flag traveled with me everywhere that I went while in country. It served as reminder as to what I left behind, the reasons why I went to Iraq and what I have to look forward to going home to. I had it flown in their honor the day before I left Al Asad, Iraq.

Gulfport...

After just under 72 hours, since leaving Kuwait, we arrived in Gulfport. What a mess. From Kuwait, we had 90 minute layover in Germany. Four hours later we stopped in Shannon, Ireland. GREAT BEER, even at 7 in the morning! Eight hours after that we hit the Big Apple. We landed and I noticed the snow. Less than fifteen hours earlier we were surround by sand. Anyway, we were scheduled for a two hour later and then the snow started falling. They cancelled our flight but other flights were still going. We tried to switch carriers but no one could accomodate our numbers. The decision was made to hunker down at a hotel but the closest one was over an hours drive away and that did not account for the driving conditions. The decision was made that we would stay at the airport.

We were scheduled to leave NYC at 0600 but due to more snow, union workers, misinformation etc. we did not leave until one. Needless to say, tensions were high, very high. Our skipper tried to throw his rank around but that does not go over too well with civilians and certainly, not with union workers. Once we were back in the air, the mood shifted from tense to anxious. We arrived in Gulfport at 1530. We had a police escort form the airport to the base where we were met by a small group of family, friends and military mucky mucks. For those that had family fly out to meet them, the sight was incredible. One of officers has a family made up of four daughters, his wife and a jack russell terrier. Seeing the commander swarmed over by the people that certainly missed him more than anyone isomething that I will never forget. A couple of the guys met their newborns for the first time....whew. A scene similar to these will unfold for

me in a couple of days.

I cannot wait.

Here we go....but not really...

Pic one: These are just a few of the people that made dealing with this deployment easier to deal with. L to R: Ron, me, Skidmark, Chubez, Cubby(kneeling), Kid Paul, Peru, LA, Cuba and Slopez. Hanging out in front of my can, grillin. It was my last night in Al Asad so "my peeps" had a cook out in my honor but I ended up on the grill.

Pic two: Dan"Boy Band" and Ron "Hater". Getting ready for my final mission, outside the wire. Ron had just finished naming and stenciling our trucks. We rolled out on "Upper Decker". If you know what that means keep it to yourself. Ha!

: Pic 3: Me standing in front of our 'Cans', or living quarters. For every window you see behind, you can find a room, 15X12. Big enough to fit two racks, two night stands and a double wide locker, oh and two service members. Cozy.

We hit the Big Apple and we could not be happier!!! but then the snow kicked in and they cancelled our flight. We were going to spend the night at a hotel but with the road conditions the way that they were and with our departure window opening at 0600 the skipper decided to keep us here. The airport staff was nice enough to let us sleep in the VIP lounge. Whcih is real nice except for the fact that we have over 100 jet lagged Seabees jam packed in here. Oh well....

As I mentioned before I am going to do my best to bring you up to speed with my blogs...I will be hoping around from topic to topic..

That said, heck out the following....

Jan. 10, 2007
It’s the moments alone that really make this place hard to deal with. I find myself lost, literally lost, in my thoughts and memories of home. We go about our day to day stuff like robots. This actually helps with dealing with the fact that we are so far from home but it’s the time spent alone that forces us to look deep within ourselves. I had one of those days today….
I was working at one of our sights, filling the Hesco’s . I was out there by myself. I started thinking about my boys, my wife, my mom and dad. Just going down the list of the people that I miss the most and it hit me. I have now been gone for over four months with at least two to three more to go. What do my sons really think of me? Do they resent me? What about my wife, does she really and truly understand why I am out here. Why I stayed in the reserves? And my parents, they were not born here. How do they really feel about me being out here? So many questions and no answers, not a single one. As it is the hold that I have on my sanity is a very fragile one at best. I was so close to giving up today. I thought about going to the chaplain’s office and just letting it all out with the hopes/intention that he would get the ball rolling to get me out of here ASAP. I’m not even sure if he could do that but the thought was definitely there.
Jan. 19, 2007
This morning I received word that I will be leaving this place a few days ahead of schedule. I will be out of here on March 11. That means that I should be home in time to see my daughter pop out of the oven. Receiving the news this morning did wonders for my personal morale. I did not realize that it was that low but I can tell you that I noticed the difference immediately. Since arriving in county I set my calendar up with me arriving in El Paso sometime in April. Needless to say my countdown has taken a big and very welcome drop. As of today my count is at fifty days. Just typing fifty days makes me smile. Ha! I can now actually start planning on doing the things that I have been missing and every one of them involves my wife and kids. Ah, to be home again.
Feb. 5, 2007
I am now back at Al Asad, not my favorite place to be but I am almost out of here. According to my Chief I will be on the early bird in a little over a month. I cannot wait for that.
Feb. 07, 2007
I had my first official day off yesterday. Although it was very nice to not have anything to do, it still sucked. I sat around and just got lost in my thoughts. I kept thinking about my wife, the boys and my family. So much time has gone by since the last time that I saw them. How different are things for them now? How are they going to react to having me around again?
These thoughts stayed with me all day long. For the most part, I was miserable.
Feb. 19, 2007
I had a real scare today and that is not something that is easy for me to admit. I was told a few days ago that I would be heading out for another mission. I was slated to convoy to KV, Korean Village, which is near the Syrian border. KV is not a bad place, at least that is what I am told. I was more concerned with the trip up there. I was going to go in one of our armored trucks. I was dreading it. As I said, I knew about this trip and it had been weighting and today it hit me. Hard. I kept thinking about the battalions that have come before us and historically the last month of the deployment has been the scariest and in some cases, the deadliest. I let so many negative thoughts come over that I just let them get the best of me. I sat in my can and cried. It was nothing but fear pouring out of me. I prayed to God to keep me from going. I returned to out compound and I let a few people know that I did not want to go. I did not tell them how badly this was affecting me. It did not look too good for me and I could not back out of it completely. I went to work and those thoughts came back. I sat there and thought of typing up a few good bye letters to my wife, my boys, my family and to the other ‘bees. Just in case. Chief Price came up to me and said, “Well, I hope that you did not have your heart set on this trip but I need to send someone with some solid experience on this type of equipment. Just like that, I was off of the hook. I have to say that with all of the work that the Marines and the Army have put into securing the roads for all of us, the trip itself would not be that dangerous but I let the thoughts get in, I just mind fucked myself, all day. My wife could tell that something was wrong but I could not bring myself to tell her. Not in her condition.
I am now sitting in front of my can thinking about how things work and how God does work in mysterious ways. Do I deserve this reprieve?

March 11, 2007
Well, Izabella Angel joined our family on February 23. Monica started bleeding and they had to go in and do an emergency C-section. Mom and the baby came out of it with flying colors. I had to wait a few days before I was able to receive and view the pics that the family had sent me. Izabella is one beautiful baby. She looks just like her big brother Sergio looked at that age. Which means that Izabella looks a lot like me. Oh well. “Sorry kid, dems da breaks.” Ha!
So now I am finally on the first leg of my journey home but let me back up to Feb. 20.
I was extremely concerned about the mission that I was pulled from but fate was not on my side. Due to lack of operators my Chief had to put me on a list for an upcoming series of missions. I was assigned to UD Green 2. A Driver, Comms.. with Dano as my driver. Dano, or Boy Band, is one of my closest friends out here so being assigned to his truck was easier for me to deal with. Yes, being out on the road, outside the wire, did pose a bit of a problem with me but since Dano has been running convoy missions since Day 1. So being on this (these) mission(s) with him were easier to get through. He knew that I was more than a little concerned but he did not pull me aside to give me a pep talk or go out of his way to keep me motivated. Nope, he just went about his usual routine. His “It’s just another mission” approach to this mission made me feel at ease. Their was still some apprehension but it was now manageable.
We headed out on our mission, at night, and it was not as bad as I had imagined it would be. Actually, it sucked. The trucks that we ride in are not designed for comfort, they are designed for safety. Which is not a bad thing but would it cost the government that much to install another couple of inches of the soft stuff on the seats? Jeez! Dano and I rode along, the conversation was flowing. The guy is as down to earth as can be. He puts the low in mellow. He carries himself with a calmness that affects everyone around him. He is like a hit of weed. I call him the Columbian Red, the Jamaican Gold, the Ganja. Not that I know what these names mean but they sound cool.
Anyway, we had been rolling along for about three hours when I spotted tracer rounds at about 500 meters. Since I was running comms, I called it in. “Victor 1. Green 2. Tracer rounds spotted. 10 o'clock. 5 clicks. Over.” You sure? “Stand by.” I turned on the NVG's, looked out towards my ten. One-thousand. One thousand-two. One thousand-...TRACERS!!! “Victor 1. Green 2. Confirmed. Tracers at 10 o'clock.” By now the other vehicles had spotted the same thing. The gunners had zeroed in on the location. We called it in to the COC. The army had engaged the enemy. Back up was not requested or needed. We waited for a few minutes. Which felt like hours but the call came over to push forward. We started moving along when our truck stalled. It just died. The convoy kept moving forward but we were dead. The lights from the vehicles ahead of us faded into the distance. Dano and I sat there, in the dark, in a dead truck. “Victor 1. Green 2. We have lost power. I say again, we have lost power.”
Understand that if one vehicle dies, the other vehicles cannot go around that vehicle. All the vehicles behind that vehicle have to sit there until the vehicle is back on line, towed or dead lined. Luckily, thanks to one our seven ton trucks, we were able to pull start it. The kicker to this break drown was that after we had traveled to a point that put us right in line to where the tracer rounds were spotted. 'Yikes', is right.
We made it back to our home base a little over an hour later.
Whew.

So much for my reprieve.

The pics did not post in order but take a look anyway....

more to come....

Finally...

well, sort of...
I am now in NYC!!!!! It has been a long, long, LONG 27 hours and we are still not "home" yet. We get here and it is snowing so our flight to Miss. was bumped a few times and then finally cancelled. They have us staying in the VIP lounge which would be a great bonus but since there are over 100 of us jam packed in here, well, you can imagine...
Anyway, check out the mural...

Holding pattern...

Well, we go bumped from our flight. No, really. A number of expected it. I mean, after all that we have been through we have grown accustomed to expecting the unexpected. But we still have a number of guys that like to gripe and moan about "Getting screwed again". Come on, it's the military way of doing things. There is no way around it. The only good thing about getting bumped is that unlike the folks that we left behind we get to catch up on some much needed sleep. The bad thing is that as soon as we land we will begin the decompression process. So we are looking at a long day. A day filled with paperwork, long, long lines and more than a couple of higher ups trying to make a name for themselves, at our expense. Good times.

Hitting the turn, day two...

We are in stand down mode right now. Just waiting on a flight to the Big K. It will be sometime today but we have to be ready to roll now. Even with all of the crap that I have had to deal with, looking back on it now, this deployment has had more positives than negatives. Through the various "morale boosting" projects that I worked on, I was able to find my passion for art again. That in itself has made it easy for me to look past all of the back stabbing, the gossiping, the one upping, the , well I'll just stop there. Really, I can share negative story after negative story with you but it is just too much right now. Unofficially, I have started my decompression process and this blog is part of that process. I promise to try very hard to not bombard you (too much) with the venting that I may have to do from time to time.

God Bless You....

Hitting the turn...

Hi everyone! We have now started our journey home. I wish that I could tell you that it is as easy as hoping on a plane but we have to do a lot of zig zagging and even more waiting around. It will still be a number of days before I get to the states but at least the demobilization period has begun. I will catch all you up with lots of postings, photos, stories etc. Thanks for your patience. Thanks for hanging in there with me.

Take care.